October 18th, 2001



i think im gonna bleach my hair blonde again. i always think about it, so i might as well get it over and done with. now i just need to decide if i want it all blonde or if i want it like a light (golden?) brown and blonde, or somethin.

i spent almost 100$ today :o\ bought a cute jacket and dress. then i went and got myself horchata and came home. oh, and somewhere in between leaving the house and coming home, i picked up a few applications for work (ugh).

people should smile at me. i feel much better when people smile at me. sooo... im thinking if i leave the house more often, more people will smile at me. i will then, smile in return. the more people that smile at me, the more ill smile and the happier i will be. uh huh.

so now, im gonna get off of the computer (i think it makes me depressed) and make some phone calls. i think i might pretend that im normal and actually leave the house a few more times today. i forgot to call billy at the time he asked me to, yesterday. so maybe ill do that too. i want to see his new apartment. its right next to where i used to goto school. he always seems to live near one of my schools. i bet that he has yet *another* new car. his parents are rich. lucky bastard. i hold that against him ;o)

oh, i saw some dude that reminded me of robert (guy i used to go to school with). i wonder if it was him. maybe ill call him too.
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