i just did a bit of math and realized exactly how fucked i am. i had an idea, but never bothered to do the math cause i didnt want to think about it. oh. my. god. i am sooo fucked. i kinda had a plan cause i thought that other loan was gonna go through, and now that it hasnt i am really, really, screwed. im gonna sit here and do some more math and figure how much i need to be making to get out of this lovely mess. if not im gonna put a fuckin gun on that damn credit card and be done with it.
first eat, then math. i hate math.
ok, so today i didnt get much of anything done. tomorrow i will look for a job. today i sorta cleaned up and went through a bunch of papers to find people to put down as a reference. i also found pages and pages of phone numbers. i called some of them but most were disconnected :o\ i spoke to noe, and left a msg for danielle on her little sisters answering machine. ive known them since the fourth grade. they live in massachusetts now. oh, oh, and lu lu. when lu lu moved in to my old apartment building she left a note on my door with her new number. that was right before i moved to bellevue. the number was still good so i left a msg for her too. the day isnt over, yet. so maybe ill hear back from someone later. talking to noe was fun. turns out he was partying on new years where we met 34123423 years ago. i thought that was funny. he says he misseseses me (hes a flirt like that). were both aries. we make each other so crazy. hanging out with him is fun cause i know how to piss him off without saying a word. he can read my eyes or somthing. hehehe. he wanted to come visit tonight but i gots to be going. bbye. crap, i forgot to get sammys number from him.
oh, im kinda sad i didnt find heathers phone number in any of my stuff. i guess ill just have to go to her fathers house one of these days and get it again. that girl is whacko. shes fun, though.
also, im kinda pissed off at myself for not keeping in touch with some people ive met throughout the years. im really bad about writing people back and shit like that. right now i cant think of many people i miss (besides friends i held secret insane crushes for. heh), except for janet. she was a great friend. i always told myself id write her back and never did. though, i bet i could stalk her down if i really want to. we were both in the same group home together. they have keep records our for 10 years, i think. i wonder if theyd hook me up with her last name, at least.
ok. ill be back later.
oh, yeah. and how come people always know its me when i call them? my voice isnt that fucked up.
nevermind. im not going anywhere.
I GOT A HOLD OF SAMMY. hehe. he thought i didnt give a fuck about them anymore since i hadnt called in a while. WRONG. he tried to look me up on the internet but all he could remember from my url was the "angle" part. so that didnt work :o\ good thing i called. i hope he comes to los angeles soon. its been a loooooong time since ive seen those guys. now he has a wife and a baby. how strange is that? hahaha. i swear, it seems like everyone is growing up. what about meee?