September 21st, 2002



i remember when i used to be online at this time and there would be a shitload of people messaging me from my chat lists. now every person that is online is either away and/or idle. crazy.

i should be planning the day or doing something productive, but instead, im here.

i really need to make sure i get shit done this weekend. its like, important now, n stuff.

i need another creditcard, i think. the one ive got is gonna be maxed out soon, and thats what ive been living on for the past year. if i run out of money on that one, im screwed. i hope to start makin money soon. the crappy thing is, i need to spend money to make money. !#$!$#!$#!@$#!@$!

this weekend i think i may be buying myself an airbrush.

okokok. this weekend i should:
clean house.
look over notes and update shopping list, then go shopping.
clean out my old kit then transfer all my shit to the new kit. also, figure out how im gonna pack the new kit without making a mess. decide wether or not im gonna need separate kits.
design business cards.
finish project and paperwork. worry about mail on monday since the school isnt open on the weekend..
pay back a bit of my student loan since payment is due, again. i hate late fees.
buy a calender, or something to stick on the wall that i can write on.
go to a thrift store, and buy something cute that will make me happy.
finish websites. create plan and schedule dates.
write a one year goal sheet so i dont forget stuff or lose track of time.
laundry, laundry, laundry.

hrm. thats not so bad. i think its the shopping the things thats gonna kill me. ill probably spend the entire weekend doing that alone.

if i have time, i hope to play with my cameras. i should buy film.

if i had my own apartment id be soaking in the bathtub right now.
  • Current Mood
    bored bored

make-up hell

i spent over 500$. uhhh, can you say kit fee? i sure as hell can. fuckin aye. massage is much easier on me than make-up. i hate the beauty supply store, now. i didnt even get everything. i have to spend more money tomorrow. fuck. oh well.

im hungry. really fuckin hungry. there isnt anything decent to eat. spending all that money put me in a foul mood, and now i have to cook in this heat with no air conditioning. oh joy. guess ill cook as i put my kit together.i still need something to separate all of my makeup. fuck.

its funny. when jill rockow(?) came in and did a demo, she said that when she was in school she would get her credit card bill and cry. i feel her pain.

the other funny thing is one of my instructors is friend with the artist who keyed pearl harbor, and because of that movie she put out her own line or red lip colors. my instructor is the cover girl for those lip colors ("nior"). i saw her picture on the display case. it looked nothing like her. shes so cute. but, oh my god she looked sooo different. crazy.
  • Current Mood
    hungry hungry

now that im thinking about it... again

everyone that i asked to sit for me when i was desperate to get my testing done so i could graduate, blew me off. not one person came other than glen and glen gave me a hell of a time so i stopped asking since id rather not deal with him. so not one person was just like "sure, i can spare 2 hours". its not like i asked people who have real jobs or anything. even james(eseses) who i believed was gonna call me back, never did. some had lame ass excuses and the rest pretend that i dont exist. they dont even say hi anymore. fuck all these people. i dont want anything to do with them. theyre not friends of mine. fuckin worthless pieces of shit. dwaine just called wanting to hang out. fuck him. he can kiss my fuckin ass and lose my number. i really cant stand anyone when i think about it. i cant think of one person who is decent enough not to lie to me. i hope they all die lonely.

and since i mentioned it, im not gonna be graduating on time. im done with all my testing, but my partner for our final project is a flake and didnt show up on friday. even if she does show up on monday, mrs.fry said that she doesnt want me to apply my piece to her. that i have to find someone else. i couldnt get anyone one for testing with weeks and weeks notice, there is no way im gonna be able to pull a model out of my ass for monday. im not even gonna bother asking. there isnt anyone to ask. no body cares enough about me to sit. just fuckin sit. they wouldnt have to do a thing other than sit. oh well. i know i dont have any friends. its ok, i dont mind. its better knowing that you dont have any friends, rather than thinking you do and finding out that you dont. thats the worst. so this time i need not forget. im gonna get it tattoed. not "you dont have friends, naomi" but something to remind me. i can wait till i have a place of my own so i can truly be alone. i dont want to be bothered anymore. i dont want to deal with people unless im getting paid to do so.

g0sh: i just need a sugar momma
xangelicdestinyx: me too
g0sh: i been looking
g0sh: been doing construction in the rich part of town

  • Current Mood
    crappy crappy