my mom better do my hair this holiday weekend, cause i dont think i can do the back of my head. if i could, thatd be cool, cause id rather not have to deal with her.
oh, yeah. guess shes not getting me drunk. "i dont have any money", she says. of course, this after she hands me a list of whats shes gonna buy and has me chose brands.
i think the lump may be getting bigger. i cant really tell. it had to have been smaller before, cause its pretty big now. itd be nice if itd go away. maybe ill ask santa to get rid of it for me.
i showered last night, so i aint showerin again. ill shower after i get filthy at the shop, cause i wanna come home and clean anyway. i dont like to clean when im clean, cause i just fell icky afterwards.
no one has been in the shop. its been slow and booooooring. 4 days off. what the fuck am i gonna do. sitting here will kill me. fuuuuuckin aye, im screwed.
good thing i didnt go to the party last night. at least i told them i wasnt gonna go, so its not like i flaked. chris brought his giiiiirlfriend. the girl doesnt have a name. first it was "i wonder if he has a girlfriend", now its "i wonder what her fuckin name is". oh well. at least he wasnt so pissy today. think i fucked with him too much. he was talking about how mexicans leave their furniture on the street and dont keep their neighborhoods clean. so, i told him that im mexican. its was like he was about to start stuttering. if fact, i think he did. james walked up and i said "chris is talkin shit about my people", and he said "youre not mexican", all nervous n shit. i eventually told him the truth, but i was amusing myself for a minute there. then i gave him shit about other stuff and asked him a bunch of questions. when he would ask me the same questions back, id blow him off. i wasnt so nice. i was bored, what can i say. bored makes me unhappy, and im no good when im unhappy.
i hate amonia, acetone, polyester, and chris. my poor liver and the 23421545 things it has to deal with everyday.
i like blues, greens, deep reds, most shades of brown. sometimes pinks, purples.
when am i gonna learn to play the piano. i wanna play the piano.
i hate angelicdestiny.com. i made the mistake of paying for it when i remembered i was gonna have to, cause i figured id forget by the time it was due. wish i hadnt paid it. next year it goes bye bye. gettin rid of, or movin the journal too.
hrm. maybe ill get rid of all this sooner. or move it to one of the other domains. i just hate angelicdestiny.com!$@#!#$!@!
im so bad. bad, bad, bad. good!
anyhow, books are here. dont know why my mom didnt tell me that sooner. now i just wish i didnt have to clean. cant do anything till i clean, or else i be thinking about cleaning and thats no good.
my mom is such a fuckin idiot. left good food out. "you werent gonna eat it". yeah fuckin right. just like, "you told me you hate turkey". dumb fuckin bitch. 4 damn days, and it hasent even started yet.
man, i like my new books.
i keep bitching about not having a boyfriend, but if i had one i probably wouldnt want one anymore. what i really want it a place of my own, with space for my stuff, and to do things in. there is only enough space for me to sleep and sit on the computer, here. im fuckin bored. if i could do shit, i wouldnt be so damn bored, and i wouldnt be obsessed with chris. the only thing about chris is he seems like a good guy. figures. i never get the good ones. or im too stupid to realize that theyre good until its too late. youd think id have learnt that lesson the first time.
its funny how people conveniently hear the things theyd like to, and sometimes chose to hear nothing at all. i think i try to hear whats not being said.