angelicdestiny (angelicdestiny) wrote,

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so, ive been having strange dreams lately. usually i forget them a few minutes after i wake up, but this one is still in my head. actually i still remember some of the others, but this is the only one ive been thinking about. ill make it short.

i was at my jr. high hanging out with my ex "brother", victor. everything was the same. he was goofing off and being silly (as usual), but he had this big, bloody, puss filled thing on his lip. its was HUGE. he was flirting with me (again, as usual), but this time i hooked up with him. even though he had this disgusting thing on his lip. in the back of my head i kept asking "are you dying ?". i wanted to ask him, but i didnt want to be sad. so i didnt. i think that was the end of it.

im still sad about that. i wish i had known he was dying. i wonder what he was thinking while he was in the hospital. i wonder if he ever thought about me, from time to time. my ex "best friend" saw him just a few weeks before he died. i wish she would have known i was looking for him. i wish he would have known i was friends with her. maybe he could have asked about me, then i might have been able to talk to him before he died. im sad about what he did. though, i could have blown it off as "nothing much". it messed up my trust in him, and killed what we had.

i think of him nowadays when im doing something that hed thought id never do in a million years because hed say "you deserve better". im just glad he cant see me now.


backside boys - i want a fat babe
scott just sent it. its funny :o)

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