blahso, went to work at one. was kind glad, cause they were like "youre lucky you came late. we were catapulting stuff around the shop. it was so boring". tomorrow im goin in late too. met the intern who quit when i started, but is gonna start back up in january. so there goes any chance of actually getting *paid*. theyve got people workin for free non stop. anyhow, shes cute. seems nice. i should ask her " plan on having kids? oh, yeah? stay here much longer and you wont be able to, or theyll come out RETARDED. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THAT!?!" :oP she was talking to chris, a lot. back off, bitch, hes mine!@#$!#$$@#!$@! oh, wait. hes some blonde chicks. nevermind.
i think he was tryin to look when i started just cause i was new. think maybe hes gotten used to having a new chick around, cause he hasnt changed his pants and is all scruffy now. yup, that must be it. grrr!#@!#$@!$#!
ive sorta been mean to him. he doesnt say hi to me all happy n stuff, anymore. or come to say goodbye. ive been avoiding him cause i get all giddy when i talk to him. i just cant control it, so i try to stay away. he might think im a bitch now, or something. he is cool when i do bug him, but i dont do that much. only when i think "ive buged everyone all day, cept chris. better bug him at least once, so it doesnt look like im avoiding him". i also think, he thinks, that iii think, the shit is does is lame. he says stuff to me like "wish my job was more fun", when he asks me to help. i feel bad. im gonna offer to him help more often. also, because i get so giddy. i have to, like, act pissed off or ill get some stupid grin on my face. so i always look so mad when helping him. thats probably why the thinks i dont wanna help. that, and i avoid him. "oops" oh, well. wish i could just be like "look, i had the hots for you and found out you have a girlfriend. now i try to avoid you so im not tempted to flirt. it has nothing to do with you, or your job. k?". hahaha. when he walks up while im talking to other people, i get all uncomfortable and look away all pissed, then he walks away, and i go back to normal. i suck. i just cant be normal around him. im gonna try though. tomorrow. tomorrow i bother him, if not to seem more normal/friendly, then to at least get used to him so i can treat him like everybody else. yeah.
hahhahaha. hiedi and i are so much alike, its stupid. were both fucked up in similar ways.
computer is boring. i need a tv. guess its melatonin time. night.
